Sunday 23 December 2007

Day Six of Route to Management... Mmmm, chocolate

I took a while to get to sleep last night, there were a few neighbours up being a little rowdy. To be fair it's the first time I've heard them in two years and it is Christmas, but I hate being in bed awake when I should be catching up on my beauty sleep.

First thing this morning, although not as early as I'd have liked, I straddled the bike and headed off for the usual laps or Richmond Park. Unfortunately I didn't have enough time (bloody work) to do the usual three laps, so instead of a 30+ mile cycle it was more like 17 miles.

I actually felt a bit lethargic going out. I was surprised at this since I've been eating a bit more protein recently and have be getting my greens. Mind you, it was chilly and freezing fog hardly makes you more motivated to do the miles. Once I actually got to the park I cycled quite well. I am definitely noticing improvements week on week at the moment.

When I got home I dialed into another conference call. After that I had a quick shower and went shopping with the missus. I bought some cleaner and degreaser for the bike as well as some brushes. Even though it wasn't raining the bike got filthy today and stared making grinding noises. It's far to expensive to wear away due to bad maintenance so it was time I got the stuff to clean it with.

We then parted company so I could go an find her a Xmas present. Well, find the ingredients for a present. I bought her favourite treat foods - good chocolate, marzipan and dried apricots. I also got a bottle of Amaretto. When I got home I soaked the apricots in the booze and after a few hours melted the chocolate. I then rolled out the marzipan and wrapped it individually around the apricots before carefully dipping them in the chocolate and laying out to cool.

This was hard work. The smell of the marzipan and the chocolate were quite tempting, but I did resist. The result looks great. I have a hell of a lot of chocolates made and the mother in law will be delighted as she shares her daughter's rather eccentric tastes. The pair of them have been known to eat a jar of pickles between them watching telly and then open a packet of beetroot for desert.

I'm off to the mother in law's for Christmas tomorrow and I don't know if I'll get a chance to update the blog. If I don't Merry Xmas all.

Saturday 22 December 2007

Day Five of Route to Management... Christmas shopping

I awoke early enough to be at Brent Cross Shopping Centre at 0900 just as it was opening. I rushed in to buy the specific things the missus had hinted at for Chrstmas.

She wanted a massaging cushion and a jewelery box similar to this. I picked up the massager, bt the correct size and colour of box was not available so I knew I'd have to go into John Lewis on Oxford Street. Bugger. I also wanted to go to Lakeland as I saw a huge marzipn selection box that I knew she'd love as she has a severe marzipan addiction that resurfaces avery Christmas. I saw the exact same thing, but half the size for £30 in John Lewis but knew a larger one was available for £18.00 in Lakeland so didn't buy it. Unfortunately lakeland are now sold out and I don't want to pay the rip off prices, so I'll have to think of something else.

I returned home where I have to joind a work conference call to discuss our plans for the festive period as were are starting to heavily advertise our newest product on TV.

I then decided to brave central London and got the tube to Bond Street. I ran into John Lewis and they didn't have the large jewelery box. They only had medium and extra large. I went for the extra large. At the counter the guy only charged me half price as it was on sale, even though it wasn't advertised. I managed to save myself £65, just as well the other shop was sold out.

For tonight's meal I had two courses. We had smoked salmon on spinach with a little lemon. For my main I had Dover sole on a salad remarkably like yesterday. It was just like real posh food!

Day Four of Route to Management... Return of the packed lunch

On day three I roasted a chicken (organic free range of course) and had a breast with a few leaves. I am allowed 100 grams of chicken, which is pretty much a whole cooked breast. I'm enjoying eating real good.

The next day I cut up the remaining breast and put it in a sealable box with a salad made from shredded cabbage, spinach leaves and a dressing from balsamic vinegar and soy sauce. It sounds odd, but tasted great. I ate it at work and my colleagues looked on with some hilarity. For a number of them it was the first time they'd ever seen me eat.

This gave me a great sense of normality and was another step in the right direction.

When I got home I was greeted by the missus and my mother who'd been out shopping all day. They'd conspired to buy me a couple of food treats that they knew I was allowed. They bought a packet of Smoked Wild Scottish Salmon from Fortnum and Mason as well as some Dover Sole. The food for the next few days should be great.

The missus thinks we should spend a lot more time, effort and cash exploring new foods. This should stop us buying unhealthy crap as well as focus on smaller portions of excellence - rather than large takeaways. As a foodie, it sounds like a good idea and if it means I get to eat quality food like I'll have int he coming days, I'm all for it.

Thursday 20 December 2007

Day Two of Route to Management...

My mother arrived at Euston Station last night, so I drove in to pick her up. She was, as you can imagine, amazed to see the difference in me. She spent the whole journey back oohing and ahhing at me.

Back at my place I went in to auto-pilot and had a shake. Then I remembered I was supposed to be having a real meal. I waited for an hour of so and grilled the rest of the salmon. I was nice and tasty and I enjoyed it.

After I finished I took my mother for some late night shopping to Brent Cross Shopping Centre. She wanted to get my brother a bottle of aftershave and have a look around John Lewis. I actually found a bottle of aftershave I really liked. My mother offered to buy it for me, but it seemed weird for me to ask for it, so I got it myself.

We had a wander around some jewelers and I saw the most amazing watch, but I didn't have the guts to impulse buy a £2.5k watch in front of my mother. My mother comes from a poor background and has spent almost all her life on the breadline. Me chucking cash around in front of her always feels very strange.

When we got back in the car we decided to go for a spin around London in the car to see the Christmas lights. We went past Parliament, Westminster, Trafalgar Sq, Strand, Fleet Street, St Paul's, Tower Bridge, Tower of London, Oxford Street and Regent Street. The lights were great and it was good to spend time with my mother.

When we got back to the house my mum presented the missus and I with a present each. The missus got a lovely gold and necklace set with a couple of garnets in the same style as a ring she has.

I was given a set of cuff links. However, these were no ordinary cuff links. My mother commissioned a pair of 18ct gold links with a Hare on one side and a fish on the other. The significance of these is based in Scottish mythology. My mother is a storyteller and explained that the hare was the traditional for of a shape shifter, and since that's exactly what I am this year she thought it was apt. The fish on the other side should be obvious to anyone who knows my angling obsession. The thing that is amazing about them is the huge weight. Gold is heavy!

Tuesday 18 December 2007

Day Two Hundred and Twenty Four... weigh in... Day 1 of Route to Management!

I cycled to work this morning as usual. It was freezing as usual. What I have noticed recently is that my lips get cold easily, so when I arrive at work I can't speak properly for a while. It feel like when the dentist freezes your mouth.

Work was fairly normal other that it was the team Xmas party meal which I skipped. Instead I worked for a few extra hours and then bunked on an hour early. When I got home I made up a shake and did some cleaning. My mother arrives tomorrow for a couple of days and she'll expect the place to be impecable.

After a spot of housework I went to my Lighterlife class and had my final abstinence weigh in. I lost 5lbs. This brings my weight down to 13 stones and 2 pounds. THis gives me a total loss of over eleven stones. That's 158 pounds or 71.5kg.

After my class I got pack home, turned on the grill and cooked myself some wild salmon. I have to be honest I wasn't really excited about eating it, actually I was rather ambivelent. However, once I could smell it cooking and I knew it was for me I took a lot more interest.

I served it up on a plate. This as the first time I've eaten using a plate and cutlery for nearly eight months. I ate it flake by flake and enjoyed every bit of it. Afterwards I felt a bit thirsty so had a drink. It's only been just over half an hour since I had it, but I feel fine, the only sensation that is different is the fact I am a little more thirsty than normal and I can still taste the food in my mouth.

So, my journey starts now.

PS, thanks for the tips Mrs L. However, I've all but decided to have a wee dram at New Year. This will be two weeks early as it will be the start of week three rather than five, but since it will be in moderation and as a result of an adult desicion, not reactionary greed I'm guessing I'll be ok...

Monday 17 December 2007

Day Two Hundred and Twenty Three... Route to Management starts tomorrow!

Today is the last day I will only be eating packs. Tomorrow I start to eat real food. This will be the first bit of none lighterlife food I will hve eating since the 8th of May and I'm not sure whether I'm looking forward to it or not. This part of Lighterlife is called Route to Management. It lasts 12 weeks and phases out the packs and introduces different food groups week by week.

The abstinence phase of Lighterlife is simple. You eat four foodpacks of you choice and four litres of water a day and nothing else. This is dead easy to follow and it becomes like a crutch. There is no thinking about what you are to eat for your next meal, you just eat a pack. Now however the temptation to cheat will appear. The old habbits can slip back. This is the hardest part of the whole journey. The internet is full of blogs that either end at this point or are full of tails of woe.

I am determined to get this right.

I read a statistic which showed that nearly 98% of people that lose 100lbs or more put all the weight back on within three years. 70% do it in one year. I do not want to become one of the 98%. I need to be in the 2%.

I guess the reason so many fail is that they think the diet is over. It is never over. I need to keep setting goals to stretch myself. So far I've managed to reach all the goals I set myself. As soon as I get near to completing one goal I set the next.

Surprisingly I am not particularly looking forward to tomorrow's food. Partly because of the risk that eating will bring, but I hope also that I have started to really get over any food addiction I had.

I am starting my Management programme a day early. This will mean that I will start week two on Christmas Day and week three on New Years day. This will give me a bit more choice at Xmas as well as allow me some steak on the 1st. Steak Pie is a traditional mean for us at New Year, and although I will not be having that, a nice sirloin will be a great comprimise.

Saturday 15 December 2007

Day Two Hundred and Twenty One...

It's Saturday, and that means it's time for my time trial on the bike around Richmond Park. I've not been out for a few weeks due to being on holiday, weekends away or visiting my father so I was really looking forward to getting back ont he bike.

Today's forecast was dry with light winds and a morning low temperature of -2C. I've really suffered in the cold recently with my feet feeling like ice blocks when I get home. To sort this I wore two pairs of socks and a pair of overshoes which are like socks over your shoes.

These seemed to do the job and I remained pretty warm for the entire journey. My face got a bit chilly as did my hands through the gloves, but nothing really uncomfortable.

My time was great today, I pushed a bit harder than normal and didn't change down to my lowest gears on the climbs, instead I got off the seat and powered my way to the top. It felt great not to need the 'granny gear'.

I'm not sure what has helped my cycling the most since the last trip. It couls be the fact I've been training or the fact that I'm a stone lighter than last time.

Thursday 13 December 2007

Day Two Hundred and Seventeen... weigh in.

This week's weigh in coincided with my work Christmas party. I didn't want to miss the party so I called my counsellor to ask if I could come later in the week. She suggested I should miss two weeks in a row and said she could weigh me in and give me food if I arrived early.

I'd already changed into my party gear, but decided to go to the party via my counsellor. Ever since my first weigh in I've always worn the same trainers and joggers with any old t-shirt and I do not beleive she thinks I could ever look smart. So you can imagine my counsellor got a bit of a shock when I arrived in my new suit, a fancy shirt and smart shoes.

My weigh in showed a loss of seven pounds over the last two weeks which brings me down to 13 stones and 7 pounds. I have now lost just one pound short of eleven stones. To be honest, if I was weighing in with my normal clothes I would have made it through that 11 stones mark, but I'm more than happy to wait until next week.

I also told my counsellor that this will be my last week of abstinence. Next tuesday I'll be getting my Route to Management book and will actually start to eat real food on Wednesday.

This will mean I can have some turkey and salad on Christmas day. That will mean lots to me. I despiritely wanted not to start the New Year on abstinence and I've scrapped through by th skin of my teeth.

Woolacombe

For a while I've had a weekend in Devon planned. It is a good friend's 30th birthday and we were returning to the place of his stag weekend for another celebration - although this time the ladies were allowed.

We drove there on Friday and were the first to arrive other than our hosts. They've just bought a holiday flat with great sea views and it was our first visit. When we got there the look on their faces as I emerged from the car was hilarious. I had not told them I'd lost weight. My mate's missus declared she'd have walked right past me in the street and would never have recognised me.

This set the tome for the weekend and as every guest arrived they were all completely amazed at my transformation. I took great encouragement from this and will build on this when I start Route to Management.

Unfortunately Devon was stormbound all weekend, so we didn't get to do any of the planned surfing and kayaking, but it was still great to be away from London and relaxing.

I managed to stay off the food and drink all weekend. However, I was sorely tempted by the birthday cake which looked amazing. I did resist, but thought about it all night and most of the rest of the weekend. I htough I'd got over that, but recently I've started to think more about food again. I did that a lot when I started Lighterlife and maybe it's coming back because I know soon I'll be starting to eat again.

Day Two Hundred and Ten... weigh in.

Well, it was supposed to be a weigh in. Unfortunately I had to out this weekend up to Glasgow as my father was hospitalised. He's been having problems keeping food down and needed to go in to get sustenance and to find out what the problem is. I stayed up from Sunday to Thursday so got the missus to go and pick me up some food from the Lighterlife counsellor.

I got a nice hotel right next to the hospital and was able to spend a lot of time with my dad. We chatted for hours and played a lot of cards. It was actually very enjoyable to spend the time with him.

I drove back to London on the Thursday and went straight to bed as I had a long weekend ahead...

Madrid

We got up well before dawn for our early morning flight to Madrid. We arrived early at our hotel after an uneventful flight and headed out to explore the city.

Madrid really is a stunning looking place. We wandered randomly up and down though parks a palaces just lapping the place up. However, although it was always bright and sunny it was also freezing and I was delighted to have my big jacket with me.

On the second day we wandered some more and went round Real Madrid's stadium which was enormous. It was full of other Aberdeen fans who were enjoying the beer served on the tour and we all ended up singing in the almost empty stadium. In the evening we made it to Athletico's ground and was having a great time singing with our own fans as well as drinking (water for me) with the Athletico fans.

Things were going great until a large group of Spanish fans threw flares into the crowded area setting motor bikes on fire an causing mayhem. I was able to get into the stadium and watch the episode unfold from high up. It was pretty scary as the Spanish riot police seemed to pick out random fans and beat the hell out of them with sticks. It was disgusting to watch. I was really disappointed. Scottish fans have such a good reputation and there is no need to be heavy handed with us, the worst thing we do is piss in fountains... The game was a non-event. We lost 2-0 thanks to a late first half penalty and a free kick. Other than that we held our own.

I'll probably go back to Madrid when I'm eating and drinking. It looks like a nice place to take the missus. I may go again towards the end of next summer when it's not super hot and before the cold winter sets in.

Day Two Hundred and Three... weigh in.

I was pretty disappointed to only lose three pounds in the last week. I wanted to officially break through the 14 stones barrier. Unfortunately it wasn't to be and my weigh in moved me to 14 stones exactly.

After my weigh in I went home and packed my holiday bag. First thing in the morning I'm off to Madrid to watch Aberdeen play Athletico Madrid. My mate arrived from Aberdeen but was honest enough to say thet he didn't notice any difference from a month ago, even though I've probably lost a stone and a trouser size since then.

Sunday 25 November 2007

Day Two Hundred and One...

My morning weigh in was 13st 12lbs today. For the first time my weigh starts with a 13. My target weight originally was 14 stones until I realised that it still left me outside the healthy BMI range. Now that I have set myself a goal involving climbing hills on the bike I need to go a bit lower. However, with Christmas coming it could be hard to be completely abstinent. I have decided to go into management, i.e. start eating again around the middle of December. I should be 13 stones plus or minus a couple by then.

It is possible that my first meal could be some turkey on Christmas Day. Looking at myself now, although I have a gut, it's small and needs toned more than anything else. My face, chest, arms and legs do not need to get any thinner, just my bum and belly.

Using the BMI calculator on the Lighterlife website I now have a BMI of 25.14. All I have to do now is lose one more pound and I am healthy. I now have a BMI below the UK average of 25.4.

Of course, this is based on my morning weigh in, not my official clothed and fed Tuesday night weigh in.

Day Two Hundred...

I've made it to day 200. Some how these round numbers always seem to spur me on. It's been an interesting ride and there's a little more to go. I've just reread my post for my 100th day and was a surprised I didn't make more of it. I just wrote a couple of short paragraphs.

So, after two hundred days of starvation how do I feel?

Great.

I have achieved every goal I've set myself and am still on target. I am now motivated to move on to some serious challenges with my attempts at the Alpine climbs in the summer but am really looking forward to it. I've lost over 10 stones, dropped 10 inches from my gut and started to exercise seriously. It's been great.

I awoke early, as usual, got into my cycling gear and headed off to Richmond Park. I pushed it a bit harder on the way there and was a couple of minutes faster than last week, but I didn't feel any more tired. That made me confident that I could beat my previous time of 3x10km laps. Unfortunately a dreadful wind meant that even though I tried harder than my 1st effort my time was almost exactly the same. The wind also turned my feet into ice blocks.

After my laps I had a bit of a stretch and headed for home. I really pushed the pace up and was surprised at how much energy I still had left. I guess I have to try harder on the laps.

I went shopping with the missus in the afternoon. We bought Guitar Hero 3 and spent the rest of the night playing rock tunes. I went to bed pretty tired.

Wednesday 21 November 2007

Day One Hundred and Ninety Six... weigh in

This week has been a pretty slow week in terms of losing pounds. I have been the same weight, every morning sine last Friday and so didn't expect much from this week's weigh in. Therefore, I was surprised and delighted to chalk another 4lbs off my total. My new official weigh in is now 14 stones and 3lbs. This means I have now lost over ten stones and also now weigh under 200lbs. I haven't been this light since secondary school.

I am still freezing cold. This change in the weather does not agree with me at all. Even at home with the heating on full I find myself shivering and needing to wear extrea clothes.

I visited the gym at work to have a chat about joining and seeing one of the intructors. Unfortunately they were all busy givinh classes as it as lunch time. I've arranged to go back another time. I am looking for a plan to help me get the fitness required to get me up some serious mountains on the bike.

Sunday 18 November 2007

Day One Hundred and Ninety Two...

I awoke in the morning quite tired and thought about dozing, but I'd laid out my cycling gear the previous night and was determined to get out for a training run.

I had a shake, dressed, filled my water bottle and started off for Richmond Park. The park is almost exactly 5 miles from my home so I am well warmed up when I arrive. I decided to cycle anti-clockwise this time and started my time trial. Each lap of is 10km and my training run is 3 times round. This gives a total of nearly 30 miles which is a decent session as I try to get fit.

My total for the three lap was 1hr 25mins and 17secs which is pretty poor for a decent cyclist, but I was happy just to finish to be honest. A few of the climbs are pretty hard when you've only had 125 calories for breakfast and you burned more than that before you even started the time trial. I'm looking forward to a time where I can actually have some spare energy in my system.

Before starting for home I had a little stretch and phoned the missus to ask here to run a bath. My feet were absolutely freezing and I could think of no better way to get some life back into them than a nice bath. The rest of my body was fine, the lycra tights and the new jacket seemed to keep the elements out.

When I got back the missus had run my bath and I dunked myself for about half an hour relaxing all my muscles. I was surprised that although I was tired I had no aches or pains.

After getting dressed we took the tube into town where we looked at clothes. I got a new suit. I ended up going for a Ted Baker which after trying many others was an instant favourite. It fits snugly and will give me room to shrink a little. My current shape required no additional tailoring, but they assistant said if I continue to shrink they'll take it in at no charge. That gave me the piece of mind to go for it.

When we got home I listened to Scotland lose to Italy on the radio and was a bit gutted so we went to bed early and watched a movie with the missus on the laptop before falling into a deep sleep.

Thursday 15 November 2007

Day One Hundred and Ninety...

I'm wasn't at work to do as I had to go to an appointment with the missus. Once we were done we caught the tube home stopping off at Sloane Square for a look round the. shops.

I fancied a new winter jacket. I had a great waterproof warm parka that I loved and needed to find a suitably large replacement. In the end I found a very snug North Face jacket that should see me through this cold snap and beyond.

A good friend yesterday told be he's planning on getting married next month. This is obviously all happening very fast. He's asked me to be his witness at the registry office, so I guess I'll need to get myself a suit. I had a look today and saw some lovely ones. There's a Ted Baker and a Reiss one that I'm very tempted with. I guess I'm going to have to leave it as long as I can so I am close to my finishing weight as possible. I don't want to spend a whole load of cash on a suit for it not to fit me a month later.

I am really cold tonight, but am feeling good that I am buying normal size clothes. My new jacket is a medium, although my suit size is still on the large side. I am a 42 chest and a 36 waist. I reckon a 40 chest and a 34 waist would be perfect for me. I'm hoping in four weeks I can get down to that size. I this this is an attainable goal. About three weeks ago I got some sale trousers in Next for £5. I bought them in size 36 and a pair of 34s too. At the time I couldn't fasten the 34s, but now they go on in relative comfort, so I should manage a 34 in 'posh' trousers.

Wednesday 14 November 2007

Day One Hundred and Eighty Eight... weigh in

Just a quick update before bed.

I lost 3lbs this week. Unfortunately this left me 1lb short of my 10 stone target. However, my 139 pounds total is not too shabby.

We talked about where we want to be in future in the class tonight and all I could think about was the goal I've set myself in getting up L'Alpe d'Huez. The enormity of it scares me a bit. I hope it spurs me on rather than causes me to freeze.

I also asked my counsellor to order me in my management book as I reckon in a month or so I'll be ready to start that journey. My BMI is now 26 and is just above the magic 25.

For the first time I am now getting people telling em not to lose anymore weight. When I explain that I am still at least a stone and a half overweight nobody believes me. I am now 14 stones and 7 pounds. I can actually lose 4 stones and still havea healthy BMI. My goal is just to be healthy for the New Year.

Tuesday 13 November 2007

Day One Hundred and Eighty Eight...

A spooky thing happened to me today.

I was in the lift on my way to a meeting in a building I used to work in. I saw one of my old colleagues in the lift and said Hi. I got a polite 'Hi' back, to which I replied 'how are you doing?' The guy looked completely confused.

I asked, "you don't recognise me, do you?" He didn't. When I explained who I was he was amazed.

I didn't think I'd changed that much.

Day One Hundred and Eighty Eight...

I ordered a whole stack of books the other day from Amazon in an attempt to get some motivation on my new goal of climbing some serious alpine hills on the bike.

They all arrived at work on Monday and I carried them home. I don't normally have a lot of time to read books so I wasn't really sure when I'd get a chance to bury myself in them.

They arrived packaged up in a nice box which was great for carrying them home. Except that I didn't have any gloves and my hands were freezing. This is really weird for me. I never get cold, but on Lighterlife, I've been freezing for a while. I need to get myself a big jacket and look out my snowboarding gloves.

I decided that the best way to warm up and guarantee I got to read was to run a bath and stay in there for as long as possible before going to bed. The plan worked. I managed to read the whole thing, finishing just before 12. I then drifted off to some great sleep.

I read Flying Scotsman by Graeme Obree. You may remember him as the guy who built his bike from an old washing machine and proceeded to become world champion and smash record after record.

It was a great read. It was great to just spend time with my head buried in a book. I do not do enough of that these days.

Saturday 10 November 2007

Day One Hundred and Eighty Six...

I was desperate to get out on the bike today, but since I had no decent clothes that fitted me I decided to go to decathlon and get some gear instead.

I got a nice jacket and a pair of lycra tights. Yup, lycra tights. I can't believe I am going to end up wearing tights. A couple of months ago I wouldn't dream of wearing them and now I'll happily go out in public with them on.

Someone asked me if I had a before and after picture. I haven't posted one of those on here yet, so it seems like a good time.

Here's me a month before starting Ligherlife weighing 24 stones and 6 pounds. This was a dress up for work day for comic relief.



And here I am today at around 14 stone and 10 pounds. I put on my new tights and jacket...




Tomorrow I am off to go indoor skydiving. Right back at the start of the programme I tried to find things to to that I couldn't do when fat. Skydiving is one. The missus decided to treat me to some lessons and tomorrow is the big day. I'm really looking forward to it.

Day One Hundred and Eighty Two...weigh in

This weigh in marks 1/2 a year on Lighterlife.

Forgive me if I sound smug... I have completed 6 months of this crazy diet without ever cheating. There have been ups and downs, but I've managed to focus and stay on track.

This week's weigh in showed another loss of 5 pounds. In total I have lost 136 pounds. I now weigh under 15 stones. With any luck I will lose another 4lbs this week and maybe go through the 10 stones lost barrier.

I am delighted.

As part of my plan to cycle up Alpe d'Huez I decided to splash out and buy a road bike. My mountain bike is not the machine I want to go up these alpine roads on. I bought a Wiler Mortirolo as it fitted me very nicely and was, quite frankly, the best looking bike in the shop. I'll post a picture soon.

I took it for a few laps of Richmond Park and it's gorgeous to ride. However, I was a bit cold at the end of the trip so I guess I'll need some warmer cycling clothes. Obviously I have none that fit me anymore.

Day One Hundred and Seventy Five...weigh in

After a 3lbs loss last week I was hoping for a bigger loss this week and I got one. It was back to 5lbs. I am really hoping for big losses at the moment. I am hoping to get into management before xmas so that I can have a slice of turkey on the 25th.

I have now lost 131 pounds.

I have also decided that my final goal on my weight loss journeu is to climb L'Alpe d'Huez on my bike next summer. This will be hard. Very very hard. I have decided to start light training immediately and will make this training a lot more extreme once I am eating again.

The Tour de France go up Alpe d'Huez on the 23rd of July and I'd like to try to do it on the day before or the day after. This does not give me a lot of time to get fit. The weight loss will simply not be enough. I'll have to rebuild my fitness and my muscles from scratch.

Athens

We arrived into Athens in the early afternoon and managed to find our hotel in the middle of the city fairly easily.

My mate had booked ups a twin room. When we arrived we thought we got a double, but on closer inspection it was two singles pushed together. The room was as cheap as chips and was pretty decent. Once we separated the beds a little and unpacked we wandered off to see Athens.

We just walked about. I was interested in a couple of pairs of shoes and a watch, but we didn't see much either of us fancied. The weather was nice and warm without being too hot, although Ian, being a Highlander (and not on LL) thought it was boiling. I actually wore a jacket as I still have cold hands and a lower core body temperature than I am used to.

Once we'd wandered around and got our bearing we went back to the hotel. Ian knew I would not be eating and drinking and was happy to have a takeaway sandwich for his dinner.

The next day we decided we'd go to visit The Acropolis. This historic site is probably the most important thing to see in Athens. Since it was a good day we decided to walk from the hotel and soak up some sun. There was a lot of work going on as they are renovating the museum and repairing the sites. Here are a couple of shots of the Parthenon.





That was about as good as I could get without all the builders in the way.

In the afternoon we went to a restaurant so Ian could have some dinner. I munched a bar from my shirt pocket and had a litre of water. He had lamb souvlaki and baklavas for desert. I was jealous but not even a little bit tempted.

After wandering back to the hotel we decided to leave to go to the fotball stadium to watch the Aberdeen vs Panathaniakos match. On the way we passed many riot police with shields and well used batons. They also had what looked like tear gass grenades. It was very disconcerting. In the ground our support had a netted off area behind the goal, again it was very intimidating. The match went off without incident and although we lost 3-0 and took ages finding our way home it was a good night.

Back at the hotel I raided the vending machine for more water, mixed up my last shake and went to bed.

Day One Hundred and Sixty Eight...weigh in

First of all I have to again apologise for the lack of updates. I am now giving up on trying to daily post and will now officially just update it when I can be arsed. Hopefully this will make me post more often, as I've been put off writing as I had so much to catch up on.

Work was crazy. We had our worst ever failure since I started nearly eight years ago. Everything that could have gone wrong did go wrong. I forced myself to leave the office to make my Lighterlife class at 9pm and I only just made it. I had to leave the room to attend a conference call which was embarrassing. However the problem for resolved around 10pm and I managed to lose 3lbs this week. I guess that is a positive outcome. My new total weight loss is 126lbs.

My friend was flying down from Aberdeen that evening so we could head out to Athens the next morning. The missus went off to the airport to pick him up while I was in class. Unfortunately his flight was delayed by an hour or so and he didn't arrive back to our place until around midnight. He hasn't seen me since I started Lighterlife so was completely gobsmacked when he saw me. He actually thought I looked a bit ill. To quote him, "you look like a cancer victim".

I was completely knackered after a stressful day, but the truth is I have stated to look a lot more tired recently. I have more lines around my eyes and they are more sunken. I knew this was coming. I have an uncle who lost several stones Lighterlife and he also looked drawn and gaunt towards the end and continued to look slightly sickly for around a year. I think it is the loose skin on your face just not looking right for a while.

Anyway, I wasn't really up for chatting as our taxi was picking us up at 5.15am the next morning so we both went straight to bed.

Thursday 18 October 2007

Another Kayak Photo...

Day One Hundred and Sixty Three...

The missus has gone out for dinner with a few mates. It's like we're passing ships in the night at the moment. She got home from her holiday last night and was in bed by the time I returned from my class.

I'm out all weekend and then I'm off to Athens. Previous to her holiday she was in France with work, so we haven't spent any time together for ages.

Work was pretty good today. We had a few emergency situations which the team managed to handle very well. I was delighted. This is a big relief for me as I need to hand over a lot of that work to my newly hired managers. They've proved they can cope, so that should take a lot of pressure off me.

We had big announcements of redundancies today. They do not directly affect me of my department, but I can see some big knock on effects if the anticipated strikes occur.

Tonight I am going to try to book a nice hotel in Athens and go to bed early with a book.

Mrs Lard, I promise to answer your questions soon. I've been avoiding them whislt working out how to word them properly.

Wednesday 17 October 2007

Day One Hundred and Sixty Two...

I had my skipper course after work today and I was thoroughly looking forward to it. Unfortunately I couldn't find my notes. After a long search at home before going to work and a fruitless search in the office I went along sheepishly without them. I muddled through the class this evening. We learning about tides. This is the key thing that I want to learn from the course as it is what affects me the most from the kayak.

It was very interesting and I got most of the information I need.

Unfortunately it is continued next week and I'll be in Athens so I'll need to catch up later.

I've booked a few days away next Wednesday, Thursday and Friday to go and watch Aberdeen play in Greece in the UEFA Cup. I've supported Aberdeen since I was very young and this is the first time since I've been employed that we've made it any distance into European competition.

Tuesday 16 October 2007

Day One Hundred and Sixty One...weigh in

My weigh in was back to normal this week with a loss of 5lbs. This brings my total loss to 123lbs. This also means I now weigh under 16 stones and if we switch to metric means I weigh less than 100kgs.

I have no idea when the last time I weighed under 100kgs, but I am guessing it would have been secondary school. With a few more weeks like this week I should have lost all the weight I need to by Xmas. It would be nice to be able to have a little turkey on Christmas Day as part of maintenance.

Tonight I tried the new peanut crunch bar. It is the nicest thing I have tried on the Lighterlife programme. It is the first bit of food I would actually chose to each when I finished the diet. It tastes like a tracker bar, which was one of my favourite treats before I started. I got 7 for the week.

I actually felt a bit weird getting food I like. Since I started this journey I've stopped looking at mealtimes as food and they are definitely not things I look forward to or enjoy much. I am definitely just refuelling when I eat these days. However, these bar will change that relationship as I may actually look forward to eating them. Dare I say it, they may even offer temptation to eat more than I should?

Maybe I overreacting - it has been nearly 6 months since I ate something I've properly enjoyed.

Day One Hundred and Sixty...

With the missus away and me not having anything planned then the inevitable happened and I just spent all night working on Monday. I found it quite productive, but hard going too. I often wonder where the point that your work becomes worthless is. I'm sure after 12 hours the output becomes crap.

I wrote a report on a supplier and rereading it the next day I could work out what point I was trying to make, so the work is just wasted. Normally I am fairly coherent and concise, but this is long winded and far too circular and repetitive.

I definitely think I should attend some kind of writing course. My prose is never the best, but I find it hard to work out how to criticise my own output as I read it in my own head at my own pace. I have no real idea how it 'sounds' to other readers. My mother is a writer so I should have the genes, but I've never really spent enough time crafting these skills.

Day One Hundred and Fifty Nine...

I awoke quite tender on Sunday morning. The fact that I paddled about eight miles (according to the GPS) the day before has left me with a stiff chest and arms. However, it was great to do some hard exercise. I'm surprised I can do that much physical exercise on such low calorie intake, but it seems the body can take a lot of abuse.

I mainly caught up with the washing and a bit of work over Sunday and didn't do anything to exciting at all. The missus left around 2pm to go away on holiday with her mum so it looks like I'll be on my own for the next few days again.

In the old days, if the missus was away that would definitely mean I'd be ordering in pizza most nights. That's not because I can't cook, but because I liked eating masses of unhealthy food. Nowadays the thought hardly enters my head.

Here's a shot of myself on the kayak with my first kayak caught pike.

Sunday 14 October 2007

Day One Hundred and Fifty Eight...

I awoke just before my alarm at 0530 this morning and slipped out of bed. After a quick shower I dressed and left the house. I loaded the kayak to the rook bars, made sure it was all secure and headed for the filling station. I filled the car up and bought sever large bottles of water and started the journey to Lowestoft.

The AA said it would take about 3.5hours, but leaving at 6am in the morning means there is no traffic on the roads so I made quick progress and arrived before 9am. The journey up was lovely. The sun rose and burned off the early mist, shining bright red as it did so. Where I got there there were a fine array of kayaks from the other kayak fishing forum members and a supplier who brought some along to try.

After about an hour of chat we decided we should do less of the chatting and more of the fishing. We split into a couple of groups. One headed off to sea and the others stayed in the Norfolk Broads. I decided I would try for pike in the Broads as I have never deliberately caught one.

The launch was a far less eventful one than my previous efforts at sea as the broads were flat calm. We were soon under way and fishing lures to try to tempt a few of the local fishy residents. Unfortunately we didn't catch on out first trip out. However, the lures were all chewed up, so there was definitely some interest from the toothy critters.

We had a break for lunch just after one. I mixed up a shake in a bicycle water bottle whilst my partner had a couple of rolls. There was a smell of bacon sandwiches coming from elsewhere and I felt a few hunger pangs in my guts.

The afternoon's fishing went a lot better than the morning's. I caught a couple of nice pike. I wasn't confident enough to take my own camera with me, but a fellow kayaker took a shot. When I get a copy I'll post it.

I loft for home around 6pm absolutely shattered. I had to get out and wander around the car to keep myself awake. In the old days I'd have drunk a can or two of red bull, but I than think of nothing more sure of kicking me out of ketosis than that.

The journey home was fairly uneventful really and I managed to get back in time to watch the last half hour of the rugby. After that finished I just went to bed.

Day One Hundred and Fifty Seven...

After work on Friday I got everything ready for a fishing meet at the weekend. Myself and a bunch of like minded kayak fishers have decided to meet up at Lowestoft for a few days fishing. I'm only going for the Saturday and I want to get as much out of it as possible so I prepared everything for the next day.

I made sure the batteries for the GPS and VHF radio were fully charged, I put the roof bars on, packed spare clothing and loaded the car with the fishing gear.

Just about when I had finished this the missus came in from her France trip. After a brief chat we both decided it was time for bed. She was knackered after her trip and I was trying to get as much sleep as possible before my early rise. As usual all my clothes were lined up in the spare room to ensure a quick get away.

On the diet front it was just another week of business as usual.

Thursday 11 October 2007

Day One Hundred and Fifty Six...

I woke very late this morning. Normally I am up early every day, but since I started Lighterlife I've definitely been sleeping more. This morning I slep straight through until 9am. I don't think I've slept that late for 10 years.

I arose very fast, showered, iron my clothes and ran for the tube. When I got there the Cenral Line was knackered so I emailed work from the Blackberry and was told that everyone else was late for the same reason. Sometimes the tube delays can help.

At lunch I popped off home to drive to Shoeburyness in Essex to pick up a drysuit. I'd picked the one I fancies online and wanted to try one one for size. I though I may be somewhere between a medium and a large. I tried the medium but it was too short. Apparently they're only for folk up to 5'10" and I am 6'2". I couldn't stand up in it. However, I tried on the large sized one and it was perfect.

http://www.wetsuitoutlet.co.uk/product_info.php?cPath=28_97_99&products_id=29 - I got it in the red colour. I also got a free fleece suit thrown in which just looks like a big grey romper suit. I topped off the spending spree with a pair of boots and a pair of warm gloves. I now have everything I need to keep myself alive on the water in winter.

On my way home the missus called me from France to say her flight to Heathrow was cancelled due to fog so she has to stay the night. So I'm on my own again tonight. I didn't want to do a secone night without updating the blog, so I logged on, but I will not go to my work email.

I'm going to iron tomorrow's shirt and go to bed with a book.

Day One Hundred and Fifty Five...

After going to bad late I slept in a little in the morning and walked my cousin to the tube station and gave him all the directions he required to get around London.

I quick tube ride later and I was at my desk. I cleared my calendar so that I could have the next day's afternoon off and got down to some work. I actually managed to get some stuff done! This is an unusual event as normally I am in back to back meetings.

At home at night I was at a loose end. The missus was away with work in Lyon and I didn't want to turn the computer on as it was most enjoyable the night before. In the end I read lots and ended up playing on the Nintendo DS. Although it's a computer at least I wasn't working.

I've been playing a game on the DS which works out your 'brain age'. The lowest you can get is 20 and I have been 21 a few times. Last night I finally made it to 20, so I went to sleep happy.

Wednesday 10 October 2007

Day One Hundred and Fifty Four... weigh in

My cousin arrived last night on a flying visit. He's in town to pick up various visas for a round the world journey he's planning. We stayed up late and chatted and looked at photos. It was great not o have the computer on and be working for a change.

My weigh in was pretty uneventful. I was disappointed to only lose 2lbs this week. This is my lowest loss so far. As I want to be finished abstinence by the New Year I don't want any more weeks like this. I am now exactly 16 stones and have lost a total of 8 stones and 6lbs. This is a great total, and I'll be focusing on that rather than my measly loss.

Tuesday 9 October 2007

No Longer Obese.

I forgot to mention something in my flurry of posts last night.

After my last weight loss I am now no longer obese. My BMI rating dropped below 30 and I am now only overweight.

It's just a little thing, but I guess it makes me realise that I am far closer to the end of this journey than the begining. That, coupled with the ever decreasing size of my wardrobe is really firing me up to finish this thing.

My current estimations put me finishing right about Christmas. This is later than I originally wanted and will force me to make some hard decisions around what I want to do with food and alcohol on Christmas Day and New Year.

Monday 8 October 2007

Day One Hundred and Fifty Three...

After a more eventful weekend than the previous I went back to work pretty refreshed. It was good to have my mind taken up by things that aren't work related.

Today my mind turned to this blog which I've neglected terribly recently. I thought about whether I wanted to carry on posting to it and decided I did. I definitely want a record of what I've done in the last few months.

When I started researching Lighterlife I was annoyed by the amount of blogs on the web about weight loss that just stopped. I decided mine was not going to be one of those.

So, I'm back. Readers, I hope you're still around.

Day One Hundred and Fifty Two...

I awoke around 0700 as my nephew came in to wake me up so we could watch racing cars. It was the Chinese Grand Prix and he was terribly excited. Since I like Formula 1 I was happy to indulge him and we watched it together.

After it was done and we were washed and fed we went to Decathlon to get some gear. I wanted to warm weather gloves and a waterproof jacket for cycling to and from work through the winter. I also wanted to get new lights, but they didn't have anything I fancied. I also picked up a new tent as they were remarkably cheap. We usually go on holiday to the continent once or twice a year and the one we have, although excellent, is a faff to put up and take down. This new one takes 2 seconds to put up and about a minute to pack away. It couldn't be easier.

Once my brother had gone home I did a spot of work on the computer and then watched Scotland get beaten by Argentina. I was a bit disappointed as I though Scotland should have played much better than they did.

Day One Hundred and Fifty One...

My brother arrived with his nephew just in time to watch the England against Australia rugby world cup match. I was amazed to see that England beat on of the main favourites for the competition. Whilst this was going on my brothers 3 and a half year old son played noisily with some radio controlled cars we got as a Christmas present. To be honest they are perfect for him.

After the game we popped outside to play rugby which was great fun until the wee fella got a gentle ball on the nose. Many tears later he decided it was time to go back inside and play with the cars again.

The missus made dinner and I excused myself whilst they ate roast chicken. Afterwards we put the toddler to bed and watched another shock in the rugby as France beat New Zealand.

The rest of the evening was spent chatting and catching up. I hadn't seen my brother since early July and that was at least 50lbs ago so he was pretty amazed at my weight loss. Eventually we went to bed quite knackered. Kids really can be quite demanding.

Day One Hundred and Fifty...

A century and a half of days gone on this crazy diet and things are still going well.

I'm starting to notice more and more definition on my face. I've actually got bones under there. My collar bones now permanently jut out and my double chin has all but gone. When I sleep on my side my knees are so bony it hurts and I have to move position.

I still don't feel a lot different, but when I catch myself in the mirror when I'm dressed I certainly see it.

I nipped out at lunch today to get a new winter jacket. I've really been feeling the cold recently but had nothing to wear as my jackets are all far to big for me. I was quite happy to get into a medium jacket, which although a little close fitting, will be perfect for the weeks ahead. I am guessing that I will never be below a medium size so I am happy to spend the cash for clothes I will get longer use from.

I also had some annoying news about someone I recently offered a post to. We'd agreed a starting salary for the person who is joining us on a scheme which helps accident victims back to work. Unfortunately it seems that the salary I offered was far higher than the agreed amount for people coming in from that scheme.

I have kicked off big time about this as the scheme only pays about £50 a day and I think paying someone as little as that is really taking advantage. The candidate got the job on merit and should not get a lower rate due to having a minor disability. The person has actually accepted the role on the lower pay, they thought they were getting that amount anyway, but I feel that we're exploiting them.

When I got home I spent the evening with the missus tidying the spare room and sitting room so that it was child friendly. I have lots of bits and bobs from fly tying including hooks and sharp tools which we need to keep right out of my nephew's reach

Day One Hundred and Forty Nine...

Today was supposed to be the day I started to hire my management team. I had two strong candidates lined up for interview in the afternoon and I was looking forward to offering one a job. Unfortunately the first phoned to cancel first thing in the morning and the second failed to turn up.

I was gutted. I'd put a lot of effort into hiring recently and the quality of applications has either been crap or they've been snapped up elsewhere or they simply haven't turned up. The light I saw at the end of the tunnel this morning looks a little dimmer.

I was pretty pissed off when I got home and it didn't get much better for the rest of the night. The missus has been unwell recently and things got complicated. She was diagnosed with MS a couple of years ago. This has been mostly fine with occasional small relapses but recently she's had another. This time though the symptoms are a bit more frightening. She's lost her sense of taste and a bit of here hearing. To be more precise, food she used to love now tastes bad and she has muffled hearing in one ear. Admittedly these aren't the worst things that can happen to an MS sufferer, but they have a huge impact on our lives and constantly remind us that this shadow has not gone away.

Day One Hundred and Forty Eight...

I was back at my training on Wednesday night. This time we learning about meteorology and marine electronics. This was a pretty interesting class for me as the weather is obviously very important for a kayaker. It was also good to get some information on chart plotting on the GPS.

As I left the course I got an email on the Blackberry saying that we'd better gear ourselve up for a general election as the odds were that one would be announced for the 1st of 8th of Novemeber. This would cause a bucket load of work I do not need right now, so I wasn't too happy to get the news.

Day One Hundred and Forty Seven... weigh in

Today was my weigh in. This was my first for a fortnight since the last one didn't quite work out.

I popped along to the session and met with the counsellor who couldn't have been more apologetic. Apparently the locum had some emergency surgery and all the other counsellors int he area were at a conference so nobody could step in on the night.

I explained that I wasn't too bothered as I had some spare packs. I guess in hindsight I could have complained about the loss of counselling for a week since that is part of the fee. To be honest I can't be arsed. The rest of the programme has been so good for me that it seems churlish to complain about this incident.

My loss was 11lbs over the last two weeks.

That brings my total loss to 116lbs. Over the last 21 weeks my average weight loss has been 5.5lbs a week. Of course this figure is buoyed by the larger early losses, but is still very impressive.

Day One Hundred and Forty Six...

Looking at my calendar at work I have 43 meetings this week. So it looks like I'll have to do a lot of working from home if I am actually to get any work done again this week.

My brother called and asked if he could come up with his son at the weekend. His missus is working nights at the weekend and she can't sleep with the kid running around all day. Since it'll stop me working I was delighted to accept.

Day One Hundred and Forty Five...

Sunday was almost exactly the same as Saturday. By the end of it I really did feel like I wasted the whole weekend.

Hopefully the next weekend will be more interesting.

Day One Hundred and Forty Four...

The missus got up early and went off to see a friend for a weekend up north.

I stayed at home and watched the rugby world cup whilst catching up on my work stuff. I don't normally like to work at the weekend, but until I can hire my management team below me I have to do half a dozen jobs.

At the end of the day I felt I had wasted my Saturday, but I actually did acheive a lot.

Day One Hundred and Forty Three...

This day looked great in the calendar. I had no meeting booked after lunch. This means I could actually get some work done.

Unfortunately my optimism was unfounded. I just fielded questions from my desk all day. No wonder my boss works from home any time he actually wants to get something done. I used to occaisionally work from home when report writing, but to be honest I'm not very good at it. I might have to refine that skill.

I fanced going to a film with the missus on Friday night, but the missus was too tired. Instead we went to bed quite early and watched a move.

Day One Hundred and Forty Two...

I started the day with my regular trip to the doctor for my Lighterlife update. I got my blood pressure checked which came back 127/87 which is just about perfect.

He quizzed me for a while about the programme and I answered as truthfully as I could. He asked me if I'd recommend it to others and I found it hard to answer.

Lighterlife is not for everyone. I think if you give someone the options and spell out what it will really mean for them then they would be armed to make the desicion themselves. However, I think that recommending someone starts this programme not understanding that it required constant sacrifice would be a mistake.

This is easy to follow if you have the right mindset, but would be a nightmare if you can't say no or can't resist peer pressure. You have to think about this diet hard and be ready for the ups and downs that will come your way.

At night I popped down and picked up the week's food. It was the counsellor's husband handing out the food and I didn't hang around to get weighed. I just paid my money and ran.

Day One Hundred and Forty One...

I had my RYA Day Skipper course today. We learned about yachts and powerboats and what all the bits are. I now know the difference between a Genoa and a jib and know my sheets from my warp.

This stuff will not help me paddle my kayak any faster, but I just love to learn, so am having fun anyway.

I got a message from a fellow LL'er today that the counsellor made contact with him and that there would be foodpacks available on Thursday night. Although I have just about enough food to last until next week it would involve eating more bars than normal and some flavours that I don't really like these days.

When I left the course it was about 10.30pm. The first thing I noticed was how cold it was. I was freezing as I waited at the station to take me home. When I arrived I knocked back a couple of shakes and read in bed before going to sleep.

Day One Hundred and Forty... weigh in

Today marks the end of twenty weeks on Lighterlife.

As I have repeated many times it's been pretty much plain sailing after the first few weeks. I've had a fairly average week this week which means I've stuck to the plan and have probably lost around 3-5lbs. Back in the old days I'd have lost5-7lbs, but things are slower these days.

I popped down to see the counsellor as usual at night, but the door was locked when I got there. There is a women's group before the men's, so it's unusual to see nobody there. I new my regular counsllor would not be there, but we were expecting to get the locum.

After half an hour of waiting I left and went home foodless. I wasn't too worried as I guessed I'd have enough at home. However, I was upset at not getting weighed. My scles at home weigh me higher than the official Lighterlife scales, so are not an accurate indication of my progress.

When I got back home I counted out my packs. I had 26 left over, which at a scrape would get me though to the next session. On the plus side, I'd saved £66.

The reason I had so many is that a few times when I was working late nights and split shifts I got mixed up and didn't eat all my food. On top of that, every now and again I miss one during the day and don't want to catch up at bed time since it means getting up in the night for a piss.

I did feel sorry for the guy who'd just started the week before though. He'd had a good abstinant week and now had no food. Of course I offered a share of my spares, but he refused.

Day One Hundred and Thirty Nine...

First of all I should apologise for not updating the blog for ages.

A mixture of my new job and the missus being unwell has meant that this has had to take a back seat for a fortnight. However, I'll do my best to fill in all the details.

Monday was the usual hectic start to the week. Again the weather was crap so I didn't cycle in. I haven't been to work on the bike for a while and am really missing it.

I am starting to find my feet at work and am only just realising how big my world is getting. At forst I thought it was just a little extension to my existing role, but no, this is much larger. I had my first board meeting this week and I have to say everyone was most welcoming. I got a few, "it's about time" comments, which cheared me up and made me feel less like a fish out of water.

Sunday 23 September 2007

Day One Hundred and Thirty Eight...

First thing this morning I went to B+Q to pick up a file. This was the last tool I needed before attacking my kayak. I decided to install my fish finder today.

With everything I needed I wandered off to the garage and prepared everything. I was quite nervous for a couple of reasons. I was drilling holes in a boat. This doesn't ever sound like a good idea to me. Secondly, I was fitting a bloody expensive piece of electronic equipment and I had to get it right.

The first thing I had to do was build a battery housing to store a largish 12V lead acid battery. I also had to add fuses so that it wouldn't blow the circuits. Whilst doing it my watch shorted the battery leads and the sparks flew for about a second. That was a wake up call. It actually spot welded a few of the link in my watch strap and left a mark on the strap. My watch is an expensive Breitling, so it was a bit worrying for a second. There was no damage to the watch internals. However, where the strap actually melted it also burnt my skin. This was not a good start.

Once that was done I started to do the drilling and filling on the kayak. The first thing to do was drill holes for the mounting screws for the display and then drill and file out a larger hole for the cables. Once that was done I glued in the battery unit inside the kayak and mounted the transducer (sonar sensor). I then added plenty of silicone sealant around all my holes and screwed the display on.

I connected up the battery and lo and behold it worked straight away. Of course I will not know if the sonar works until I get it on the water, but the map showed me where I was, so the GPS works.

Here's the shot from sitting in the kayak.



I finished in good time to have a play on the computer and watch my team get hammered by New Zealand in the world cup. I'm now off to iron my shirts for the week and go to bed early with a movie.

Day One Hundred and Thirty Seven...

On Saturday we had a lie in. We had loads of plans for the day, but I mostly sat in front of the computer doing work or in front of the TV watching the rugby.

In the afternoon we went for a little shopping and the missus bought a few pairs of trousers. I didn't see anything I fancied. I also have a problem with spending money on clothes that I don't think will fit me in a month or two. I like to get years out of my clothing purchases.

I also have no idea what kind of clothes I should be wearing. For the last few years all of my clothes have come from M+S or High and Mighty as that's all that fits. Now that I can chose anything I am a bit lost. I need some style counselling.

I've never been really into fashion or style, but I guess I better get a little clued up or I'll look like an arse.

Day One Hundred and Thirty Six...

I was planning on getting a few things I needed for the kayak and then starting work on fitting some of the bits and bobs. However, I couldn't find any of the things I needed locally. Once I realised I would never get them in London I gave up and decided to go sea fishing. I checked the weather and the tides and decided that Brighton was the place to go.

I packed up my gear and headed south with a couple of bars and lots of water.

On arrival in Brighton I was gutted to see that the sea was much choppier than the forecast had predicted. The marina arms were closed as the waves were crashing over them.

Instead I decided to go for a wander and, quite by accident, founf a chandlers that had the exact things I needed for the kayak. A few minutes later I was leaving with the correct adhiesives and sealants that would fix all the right bits to the kayak.

By the time I got home it was too late to actually fit the stuff, so I watched the rugby and went to bed early to watch a film.

Thursday 20 September 2007

Day One Hundred and Thirty Five...

I awok early and looked to get ready for fishing. UNfortunately the wind was too high and I didn't want to risk it in the kayak. I wasn't sure what I wanted to do, so I went back to bed. THe missus decided she was too ill for work so we just had a sleep in for a while.

Eventually I got up and checked in to my work email. I then found that my fishfinder had been delivered to the office, so I decided to pop in to get it. Big mistake. It took me hours to get out again.

Once I escaped I quickly called in to Argos. I need a cordless drill as the drill I have will not work in my powerless garage. Argos sell one for £7.95. It is junk, but all I need it for is drilling through the plastic of the kayak, so I got the cheapest available.

All I need to source now is some of the correct sealant. So far nowhere I have checked in London sell it. I am hoping I don't have to take a trip out of town tomorrow to hold of some.

So, although I'm unlikey to be going fishing tomorrow, I am planning on spending a few hours "pimping my 'yak".

I need to go now and drink a lot of water. I never seem to keep on top of it an days I spend at home. I've probably only had about 1.5 litres today, so I guess I'll be spending a lot of time between the kitchen and the bathroom for the rest of the night.

Day One Hundred and Thirty Four...

I started a course tonight. To keep myself safe on the kayak I decided to get a bit of knowledge on the theory of the sea. I need to understand the tides, charts, buoys etc... I found out through a friend that a training provider does courses at my work, so I have enrolled in the RYA Day Skipper course.

These run every Wednesday until December when I have a couple of exams. I'm looking forward to it a lot. Last night we learned how to use the charts, get bearings, judge distance and use the plotter and dividers. To be honest, most of that information is irrelevant when you have a GPS, but it's fun to learn new stuff.

This makes the day very long. I didn't get home until nearly eleven, at which point I had to quickly neck down two shakes. The missus has the flu and I am starting to get a sore throat. However, I have booked Thursday and Friday off work to go fishing and hopefully fix my GPS and Fishfinder to the kayak.

Wednesday 19 September 2007

Day One Hundred and Thirty Three... weigh in

Today was my weigh in. I've been deliberately avoiding exercise to see if it will make a difference on my weekly loss. Previously there has been a correlation between no exercise and high weight loss. Whilst this makes no sense it is what the figures say. So this week I got the tube every day and didn't do any extra activities.

This week I lost 4lbs which is fine, but not great. I'm guessing that the exercise or lack of it doesn't really matter. THe plan was to follow last week with a lot of activity before the next weigh in. However, this week looks wet, and I can't be bothered cycling in. So the experiment will have to wait until next week.

My total is now 105lbs. This latst weight loss also brings me into the 16 stones bracket. I used to think that around 16 stones would be a healthy weight, but I am still carrying a lot of fat, so I'll continue to lose for a few stones yet.

Day One Hundred and Thirty Two...

I was quite looking forward to Monday. I deleted all my old routine meetings from my diary and decided to rebuild it with the help of my PA. I gave her a list of everything I needed and she just magically disappeared and fixed it all.

I was unsure as to how things would work with a PA, but so far it seems like a great labour saving device.

Diet wise there is less and less to report. It has been so stable for so long it becomes hardly worth mentioning. Three shakes and a bar per day and that's it. It is strange that so many people are commenting on my weight loss calling it a great acheivement and here's me carrying on thinking it's a doddle.

Sunday 16 September 2007

Day One Hundred and Thirty One...

The missus left the flat this morning before 6am on her way to Buckingham Palace to start her charity cycle run to Windsor Castle. I was expecting a call around 11am to go and pick her up, but unstead she finished before 10, so I had to go early. She managed to cycle the 45 miles in under three hours, so well done her.

After dropping her and her friends off in London I drove to Southampton to go to the boat show. I decided to go and see if I could pick ap a few bits and bobs for the kayak.

I got a hand held VHF radio (think walkie talkie) and a combination GPS/Fishfinder. They didn't have the fishfinder I wanted in stock, but I paid for it and should receive it midweek. The boat show was huge. There were so many displays and stands for anything to do with boating. From huge engines, to kayaks, to boat carpeting the show had it all. I did realise just how rich you have to be to have one of these things. Even some of the cheap ones were £200K. The weather was lovely for most of the day, but as I left is started to rain, so I had to run for my car.

The journey back up the M3 and M4 was awful. It took an hour and a half to get down and three and a half to get back.

Anyway, I've got to go and iron my shirts for the week and massage the missus' stiff legs.

Day One Hundred and Thirty...

I was really looking forward to the weekend, so I got up early and got my fishing tackle ready. When fly fishing all of your kit fits into you waistcoat. Unfortunately mine is now far too large for me, so the first stop before going to the lake was to get a new one.

I tried on a large expecting it to fit, but it was American sized so I ended up going for a medium. It feels really weird buying medium clothes. It would be a little tight under a jacket, but in no time at all it will fit me perfectly. They are pretty expensive bits of kit, so I didn't want to buy it twice.

It was a lovely day, but the fishing was hard. I could see all the fish shoaled up going round in circles, but they were not interested in anything I presented them with. When it gets warm the trout can become completely disinterested in feeding and it looked like on of those days. After a couple of hours I gave up and went home to watch the rugby.

At night I photographed a lot of my older fishing gear and placed it on ebay. If I get what I expect then I'll be about £500 to the good, so I have my fingers crossed.

I should also place my waistcoat and jacket up for sale too.

Friday 14 September 2007

Day One Hundred and Twenty Nine...

Well, what a week.

Today I got my letter of confirmation stating that I was the owner of the land an all my plans were back on track. This will not be the end of it, and I expect a lot of grief from one particular family member, but legally it's game set and match to me.

It was my first week in the new job. I'm still feeling my feet and not quite sure about things, but so far it's been a blast.

I've been neglecting the blog this week, and also not catching up and commenting on others as much as I'd like. Hopefully I can get some more time to catch up over the weekend.

I'm planning a fishing trip somewhere tomorrow and on Sunday I have to get up early as the missus is doing a sponsored cycle from Buckingham Palace to Windsor Castle. The route is over 45 miles long, so I am expecting to drop her off and pick her up.

The diet is going as well as it could be and I managed to get to 17 stones on my morning weigh in, so hopefully I can make it into the 16s soon.

Day One Hundred and Twenty Eight...

Work was been much the same as the rest of the week. I am definitely getting more comments about my weight. A few of the lassies at work have started to say nice things too. Previously it's mostly been blokes that have commented which surprised me, but now the fairer sex are also paying me compliments.

I was talking about my weight loss and my promotion with my brother on the phone when he said, do you think it's the weight you've lost or the promotion that is generating the comments from the ladies. He's a such a cynical bastard.

When I got home I didn't do much. I was pretty tired so we went to bed early and watched a film. It was the second Pirates of the Caribbean film. It was pants.

I read Lesley's comment today congratulating me for not eating when I was stressed. I have to admit the thought never even entered my head. But it got me thinking. Warning, the following is just a brain dump and may be complete bollocks.

It's funny, Lighterlife tries to make you face up to your emotional need for food. I've never believed I over ate because I was depressed. I ate and drank too much because I liked it, was too greedy, and didn't know when to stop. I've never knowingly binged because I was unhappy.

Maybe I am deluding myself, but I'm trying to be as honest as I can. When I read people's blog posts about them eating because they're unhappy, or because certain moods trigger cheating, I struggle to empathise.

For me it boils down to excuses. I've never wanted or needed an excuse to eat whatever I like. If I wanted to have it, I just did. I've never felt the need to justify it.

Having grown up with alcoholism I know that alcoholics live their life actively looking for an excuse to drink. They can then blame something or someone else for their relapses. Ask yourself are you in that boat?

Wednesday 12 September 2007

Day One Hundred and Twenty Seven...

At work in the morning I got confirmation that my land deal had been completed on Skye and there is no possibility that I can lose what I though I had. I should get the documentation in the next few days. Apparently it has been legally mine since the start of the month. So, the developer that is drilling bore holes in preparation of a planning application is in for a bit of a shock.

I also met my new PA today. I've never had a PA before, so that'll take a bit of getting used to. I've also been told I must get a Blackberry. I've been resisting one for a year or so, but it looks like I have no choice now.

Now that I am going to work in clothes that fit me the compliments are coming in thick and fast. It's great.

Day One Hundred and Twenty Six... weigh in

I phoned the department on Skye dealing with my land acquisition first thing in the morning. I explained that it looked like a developer was building on my land and I was confused. He reassured me that he'd had no application to sell any plots on the land and that it would be mine before anyone would be able to sell it. This is good news, but I expect to be getting angry phone calls from irate folk who thought they were going to make a quick buck at my expense.

So with that sorted I drove to work. I had to take the car as I was heading to a supplier meeting in the afternoon and I give a handful of folk a lift to save the company in train and taxi expenses. The meeting went well and finished early so I made it home about 4.30. I did an hour or so work on the PC and then just played on Facebook. I finally succumbed and signed up to it. Almost everyone at work uses Facebook and a few of my friends use it to arrange all of their social events, so I ended up having to sign up.

I stuck my kayak photos up and got some really great comments from folks who haven't seen me for a while which was great. Apparently I look like 007! Well, it made me laugh.

It was also my weigh in tonight. I lost 4lbs. This breaks me though a couple of barriers. I broke through the 7 stones lost barrier and also I joined the century club. I have now lost 101lbs.

Yee ha!

Day One Hundred and Twenty Five...

It's been a couple of days since I last posted, but as you may have guessed from previous posts I've been a little busy.

On Monday morning I woke up a few minutes before the alarm and quickly showered and dressed. I dressed smart for work with my new well fitting shirts and my new shoes. I decided to get the tube to work so that I didn't crumple all my clothes in my cycle bag. I was presenting to the team and senior management so I wanted to look as good as I could.

This was the day that my department was created and the first my new team would hear of it. The day passed in a blur and everything went well. There was a management drink 'wash-up' at the end of the day where we compared notes and had a beer or two. Of course, I stayed away from the nibbles and only drank water.

The day was a success and all the preparation seemed to pay off. Now the hard work actually starts, but I am really looking forward to the challenge.

At night I got a really disturbing call that a family member had sold some of my newly acquired land and a local developer was building a house. I was very worried about this but there was nothing I could do about it as it was late at night.

The paper work for my ownership hasn't come through yet, so technically it would be possible that this may happen. This would be a major headache as it is in the way of where I want to build a house myself.

I went to bed pretty angry on what should have been a great day.

Sunday 9 September 2007

Day One Hundred and Twenty Four...

Tonight I've managed to finish all the work I needed to for tomorrow. I also managed a trip into town to put my watch in for repairs and watched 4 matched of rugby. There were no susprises, and my team, Scotland, had a fairly decent game against rank outsiders Portugal.

So tomorrow I start my new job. Much more responsibility and a far bigger team. It's what I've been asking for a long time, but now the enormity of it is setting in. I will be the Head of Operations for just about the biggest website on the planet as well as be responsible for the operational delivery of 'the red button' on TV. Holy shit.

I've ironed my new shirts to get the horible new creases out of them, ironed my slightly too large for me trousers and buffed up my new shoes. I've really only ever worn casual clothes at work which I could just about get away with in my last role, but now I have to tow the line and get into some shirts. When I lose all the weight I need to I'll get some nice shirts made to measure for me, but in the mean time M&S will do.

Saturday 8 September 2007

Day One Hundred and Twenty Three...

I awoke early this morning. All the stuff happening at work was running through my head. I got up, did a little pottering around the house before loading up the car for the missus and watching the New Zealand vs Italy rugby match on the TV.

When the match was done I caught the tube into town so that I could pick some stuff up in Maplin. I also wanted to get some shirts and shoes. I got some of the stuff I needed from Maplin, but they didn't have everything, so another trip will be needed.

I then walked to Selfridges to see about some shirts. On the way I passed Marks and Spencer's so I decided to see what their shirts were like. I picked out one I liked in a size XL and L and took the pair to the changing rooms. I tried on the large first. It was strange trying on smaller clothes, they feel different to put on. It fitted. It wasn't exactly roomy, but there was no clinging anywhere. I was chuffed. I left the changing room and picked out another four shirts.

When I got to Selfridges I went to the watch counter. About 18 months ago I treated myself to a rather expensive Breitling watch which recently has been losing about two minutes a week. It's becoming a liability. The woman I spoke to me suggested that this was normal, but I wasn't having it. I spoke to the watch repaired and he said to return with the guarantee and they'd send it off to get it retuned. I'm hoping that will fix it. However, I'll be watchless for weeks and that pisses me off. I hate not wearing a watch.

I had a look at the shoes there too, but they were a bit too poncy for me. I have size twelve feet and this seasons return to winkle picker styled shoes look even more ridiculous on me. Instead I went to Russell & Bromley where I picked out a nice looking pair. They always seem to have great quality shoes in there. They are a bit pricey, but they last forever. It's nice to go into a shop where they actually care about which shoes you buy and if they fit.

Tonight I mostly watched TV. I caught a repeat of the England vs USA match and watched a program about American crab fisherman working off Alaska. It looked about the most dangerous job in the world. It think the missus has decided to stay over at her mum's tonight, so I'll probably go to bed early myself. I wanted to get some work done today, but I haven't. Tomorrow I must get it complete.

Friday 7 September 2007

Day One Hundred and Twenty Two...

Work was as busy as I thought, but very productive. I didn't get everything done, but there's always Saturday and Sunday. There was a weird feeling around the office as it's the last day before the big announcements. These changes are very carefully managed and myself and the other leaders have been very carefully briefed about what we can say and how we deliver our presentations. It's been a very interesting process.

Tonight I came home, did a little on the computer and then watched the first match of the rugby world cup. I was a great match with Argentina beating one of the favourites, France.

We've got a few French mates, so a couple of piss taking text messages were sent.

I'm not sure what I'm doing tomorrow. It all depends on whether the missus goes away in the car or not. I may start to make some modifications to the kayak. I need to fit a battery unit to power my GPS and Fishfinder. However, I have no cordless tools and I have no power in my garage, so I may need to get a new drill. I have to go to Maplin anyway, so if I can find a big one in London I don't have to drive to I'll stock up tomorrow.

I forgot to have lunch today. It wasn't until I was on the way home that I realised I had gone without. As soon as I got home I knocked back two shakes and waited a couple of hours until my last one. It is still a little bizzarre to me that I never get hungry.

Thursday 6 September 2007

Day One Hundred and Twenty One...

I got to work nice and early this morning. I had an early meeting planned so I was up and out the door and on my bike. Unluckily for me it seemed a lot of other people at work had the same idea and it took me about 15 minutes to find an empty shower. I ended up being late for my first meeting. After that it was just more of the same. Once I start late, my chain of meetings all cascade into each other and I'm late for the rest of the day. I even had to have my bar in a meeting.

The weekend's weather looks great, so I thought of heading out in the kayak. Unfortunately the missus is off to her mum's and is taking the car, so I've no chance of that. I've been deliberately avoiding meeting the mother in law since I started the diet. We always go there at Christmas and my target is to be finished my weight loss by then. I think she'll be delighted when she sees me. The missus' dad died of diabetes and other weight related issues, so I think this will be one less worry.

I have around five stone left to lose. If I lost the weight as fast as Lighterlife says I should then I'd be done by then, but if I lose at the speed I am at the moment then it will take well past the new year. I really do not want to do Christmas on food packs, but I will not break abstinence. If I'd thought about it fully I should have started the programme a few months before I did, but I was lazy.

When I tell people I still have five stone to lose they simply can't believe it. I saw an old friend today for the first time in three months. His eyes nearly fell out of his head. He told me I looked like a difference person and seemed genuinely concerned when I said I was going down to between 12.5 and 13 stones as my ideal weight. I think people equate you size with your personality and worry that if your mass goes so will a bit of what they like about you.

One guy at work has repeated told me I look gaunt. I don't know why. I really don't. I have a lot of weight to lose before there's a risk of that. Everyone has been great. My team are a bit bemused and probably bored that everyone who comes past my desk brings the subject up.

I've just done a to do list of things I need to be finished by Monday. I have four job descriptions to write. I have two presentations and a list of potential questions and answers to prepare. I have two spreadsheets of staff grades, salaries and positions to clear up. I have a budgeting proposal to finish. I have three requests for IT services to write to go to tender. On top of all of that I have 5.5 hours of meetings tomorrow. So I guess I'll be working a lot this weekend.

Maybe it's a blessing the missus is away in the car.

Wednesday 5 September 2007

Day One Hundred and Twenty... weigh in

My weigh in is a day late this week as the counsellor wasn't around yesterday. We all for an extra day's food and turned up today.

I was quite relieved not to have a weigh in yesterday as I was definitely on for a record low. As it turned out it was still pretty poor. I lost 3lbs this week taking my total loss to 97lbs.

After I cycled home I deliberately didn't drink anything as I knew my loss was small this week and I didn't want any extra weight at all. If I'd drunk a normal amount of water I reckon I'd have lost maybe only 1lb this week. So the trend of the more exercise I do the less I lose had kicked in again. I'm not going to stop the exercise in the near future, so I'm hoping that my body give up holding the fat and I can get back to some serious losses.

At work I had my photo taken for some award thing that I don't really understand. I put on a smart shirt that was well pressed before I packed in into my cycle bag. However, when I got to work I found that it was massive on me. So I walked around wearing a tent all day.

The missus has just arrived in from her work trip, so I better go and say hello.

Tuesday 4 September 2007

Day One Hundred and Nineteen...

I reread some of my earlier blog posts tonight. One of the things that meant a lot was the first time someone who didn't know about my diet mentioned that I'd lost weight. I still get enjoyment out of it, but now it's getting a bit dull. I answer the same set of questions three to four times a day.

I don't mind, but this programme does take over every part of your life. All of my thoughts are around keeping on the straight and narrow or working out how maintenance will work for me. What I'd like to do is be able to banish all thoughts of food and the diet so it becomes incidental to my life. Then when I finish abstinence I'm not going to simply change my focus to food and screw everything up.

Today I had a guy tell me that I was an inspiration as he's been looking at losing weight. This isn't the first time I've been told I've been an ispiriation due to my weight loss, but so far I've noticed no difference in those I've inspired.

There was a tube strike in London today so half the department turned up late and left early. I got on my high horse since I cycle in and am unaffected. However, it did piss me off that people didn't make an extra effort to get in on time. It's not the company's fault that people's journeys takes longer and they shouldn't have to pay. We're far too soft though, and since all of the other managers were letting their staff go I didn't have a leg to stand on, but still, I had a good grumble. I'm definitely turning into a grumpy old man.

The missus is in Belgium tonight with work and is just about to call to wish me night night, so I better go.

Monday 3 September 2007

Day One Hundred and Eighteen...

I seem to be getting back to my usual sleeping patterns and hace started waking early again. This morning I quickly got up, cycled to work, showered and prepared for my first meeting.

I turned up to find that nobody else had arrived at work yet. I wasn't disappointed as this gives me time to get some work done. I've got an urgent to do list as long as my arm and no time to complete it. I'm guessing I'll have to put in a few extra hours this week. Other than the usual Monday rush it was a pretty good day. I had a meeting with one of the senior managers who couldn't believe that I'd lost so much weight and was still alive.

The cycle in and out of work is getting so much faster than it was. I'm not sure if this is because I am lighter or because I am getting fitter. The clever money would be on both. The speed I take the hills on the return journey is almost twice as fast as my forst attempts.

At home I continued the washing catch up and did a little documentation for work. We've got big announcements on a restructuring in a week, so I have a hard deadline for completion.

Thanks for the positive comments folks, I've had a great week and I'm hoping this one will be the same.

Sunday 2 September 2007

Day One Hundred and Seventeen...

For some reason I awoke early this morning and couldn't return to sleep. I gave up about 8am and had a shower. The missus was waking as I left the house to clean the kayal and the car.

After a while she appeared on her way out for a run with her friends. I'd just finished washing everything and said I'd be going out for a bit.

I then went into central London. I wanted to look at a few things in town. Note, I said look, not buy. Anyway, about an hour into looking around a few shops I get an unusual number call me on my mobile. It was the missus, she gone off expecting me to still be around when she got back and was locked out.

So I had to stop my visit and head home. I was quite interested to see what size I was in various shops, but I thought it better to appease the missus and head back.

For the rest of the day I've just been catching up with the washing and did a spot of tidying up. In a couple of minutes we're off to bed to watch a film and get some early sleep.

Saturday 1 September 2007

Day One Hundred and Sixteen...

Today I was awoken by the sound of my shower radio detaching itself from the wall int he bathroom and smashing into a million tiny pieces in the bath. Not the greatest start to the day. I got up to investigate and went back to bed for a couple of hours kip before getting ready for the trip to Brighton.

I had most of my gear ready and all we had to do was load the kayak on the car and go. On the way we had to pick up a work friend of the missus. She said we'd get along since we shared a lot of the same interests and she was right. He's been interested in getting a kayak for a while, and I think I've pushed him over the edge.

On arrival in Brighton we parked near the marina where the boat trip sailed from and I got the kayak ready. This time I took my camera and handed it, and my longest lens to the missus to take one or two photos for this post. I also, for the first time, took my fishing rod. My previous trips were just getting to know the 'yak and I wasn't brave enough to risk taking a rod.

To be honest, when I saw the seas, I wondered if I was being wise. It was far choppier than I'd been out in before and the swell on the shore was significant. This didn't look easy. However, I'd come this far and I wasn't scared of getting wet.



So, after checking everything twice I decided to launch. The first attempt wasn't a success and I ended upside down in the sea. The second attempt was a lot better and I paddled as fast as I could out of the surf zone.

The waves were quite big, and some crashed over the boat. You can see it covered below. You can also see my rod attached to the side and my carry wheels in the back.



Then I was away and in clear water.



The more observant of you will notice I'm wearing socks. I forgot to bring the trainers I'd been using in the kayak. This would prove to be a right pain later.

Here's a shot of me looking back at the camera. I'm sure this is the first picture of me on here. According to the scales I am just over 17.5 stones.



I paddled for a solid twenty minutes and then got the rod ready. There was a much higher swell than I was used to, and I was quite nervous as I started my first cast. I needn't have been stressed as it proved to be quite simple to cast and keep the boat in line at the same time. There was a bit of rod and paddle juggling, but it all went fine. After a couple of casts I felt a familiar tug as I hooked a mackerel. I wound it in to the side of the boat, looked at it for a second or two and released it back to the sea.

I was delighted. Although it was only a mackerel, a fish I have caught countless hundreds of in the past, it meant such a lot to me. I would never have been out in the yak unless the last 116 days had been a success and I had lost the weight.

I few minutes, and a few fish later, one of the charter boats the missus hired for her fishing trip arrived on the scene. I paddled over to say hi and promptly caught a load more fish. About fifteen minutes later the second boat arrived to the same spot, this one carrying the missus. I paddled to within 30 yards or so and said hi. After an hour or so of good fishing and around 30 or so mackerel released I decided to paddle back to shore.

At this point I realised that I was quite far from the shore, and had drifted to around a mile west of my starting point. I had to paddle against the receding tide on the return. It wasn't too arduous a task, but it took a good half hour. Also the tide kept turning the kayak in odd directions, so I found I had to correct my course the whole time. It was a great learning experience.

As I came in to land I aimed straight for beach and at the last moment hopped out. Then a large wave lifted the boat past me and hammered it onto the stones. The tide then tried to take it away from me but I had a firm grip. I then tried to tow the boat up the steep stones in my sock clad feet. It really hurt and I wish I hadn't forgotten my old trainers.

As soon as I had the kayak safely up the beach I got out my wet clothes and got dry and dressed. About 20 minutes later the boat trips arrived back with their mackeral and BBQs. I gutted around 80 or so fish whilst someone else cooked them. I love mackerel, especially when it's fresh, but I didn't feel like I was missing anything by not having any. I'd had my lemon bar whilst waiting for them and felt great.

Around half past six it got a bit chilly so we packed up all our rubbish, loaded the car and drove back to London. Tomorrow I'll have to clean the 'yak and the car, as well as my fishing gear, but it will be worth it.

Today was magical.

Friday 31 August 2007

Day One Hundred and Fifteen...

It's the end of the week, and what a week it's been. Monday's long drive from Scotland wasn't much fun, but since then it's got better and better.

On Tuesday I managed to lose 8lbs on my weigh in. On Wednesday I got my new team structure all approved. On Thursday I had a really pleasant and relaxing evening in and managed to catch up on sleep. Today was the best of all. I got my new job title and grade through and it is everything I hoped for. On top of that, I got a phone call from Internal Communications asking me if they could send a photographer around to do a photo shoot on me as I've been nominated/recommended for some kind of internal recognition or award. She was pretty coy as to what it was all about, but I was pleased.

Tonight after work I celebrated with a raspberry shake and a glass of water. I also put the roof rack on the car in preparation for tomorrow's trip to Brighton. The missus has arranged a huge boat trip for about 40 mates, and I'm tagging along in the kayak. This will be the first time I actually fish from the thing, so I'm looking forward to it.

The diet was good this week too. Lots of water has been drunk and I've been on the bike every day except thursday. It will be interesting to see how this is reflected in next week's loss. So far, the more active I am the less I lose. I've no idea why, but I'm hoping this week bucks the trend.

Thursday 30 August 2007

Day One Hundred and Fourteen...

I had a few nice comments at work today. I'm still getting the 'are you alright' question from folks who are worried I'm ill.

I was planning on doing something active tonight, but I'm still a bit tired, so I've mostly just read again. I'm planning on going to sleep early tonight.

I had a great conversation with one of my oldest work friends today who told me he is continually amazed by my changing body shape. He knows about the programme as I told him about it right at the start. I also told him that I still hadn't beaten my food addiction (is that the right word, I mean everyone's addicted) and that the weight loss was only the start of the process.

When I say I haven't beaten food, I mean that if I was to leave abstinence now, I'd put it all back on again. My mind hasn't changed. I understand that my battles will be harder when I start maintenance. Right now it feels like abstinence from food is a security blanket. Apart from the odd hard day it's been easy for me. Abstinence removes all freedom to choose what you eat. There is no middle ground. There is no room for mistakes.

What will be hard is when I have to use my judgement. I am not stupid. I know what is good for me and what is bad. Will that stop me ordering a 2500 calorie pizza? I don't know. Answers on a postcard...

Wednesday 29 August 2007

Day One Hundred and Thirteen...

I went to bed quite late last night and even though I was tired, I awoke early this morning and couldn't get back to sleep. Rather than just lie awake in bed I cycled off to work. I took in a couple of litres of sloe gin in with me to give away. I'm just about to make some more and I'm not going to get the chance to drink last year's.

Work was the same as it's been for a while, which is very busy. I'm enjoying it, but it's getting tiring.

After my cycle home I noticed the car was looking dirty after the Scotland trip so I got out the bucket and sponge and cleaned it. Now it's all nice and shiny again. I quite enjoyed it, which is wierd. I may be turning into an old man.

Tonight I've just been reading and being lazy, so I'll have to find something more active to do tomorrow night.